Again he kept touching me, gently and just barely until I came back again. ‘Want to set up a new record?’ I asked out of breath ‘No, I just want...you to surrender to me, completely.’ he backed off and I shivered as the cold air touched my wet skin. I missed him. ‘I already do.’ I assured him. I heard his chuckle and I knew he’d push me even further. He wanted me to give in completely, not hold back anything, take all he’d give to me. He wanted to show me how much desire, lust and passion I was. ‘How could you know how I would react? I had no father. I had no one. No mother, no father, no grandparents, no uncles or aunts. I had no one!’ I almost shouted, tears now flowing freely. ‘I’m sorry, my son, I’m so sorry. Everything I did was wrong, wasn’t it. Right from the start, everything I did was wrong,’ she wailed, her face in her hands, her head bent. Ardele put her arm around my mother and held her. I watched as she did that and I felt my anger releasing. There was no point in making. On put on a sport bra to keep my sore boobs from jiggling somuch. I made breakfast and my husband was back just in time to eat.I reminded him that we had a wedding to shoot in two days and it was abig one. The happy couple were spending about twenty thousand on thewhole thing and we would be under tremendous pressure to make sure ourpictures came out alright. He told me not to worry because we alwaysdid a great job and that is why we could charge so much that we bothmade a pretty good living in. You were a loser, not because you never tried or applied yourself to something you believed in, you were a looser because people simply more fortunate than you had someone get the chance to succeed for them, unfortunately you weren't born into a family who had the ability to help you through nepotism.Your parents or friends would say "Keep trying John, you can get that job if you try hard' they would always say 'Try hard' well how hard does someone have to try before they get it? you often.
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